Saturday, September 14, 2013

Grin and Bear It

I haven't really blogged in awhile. I've really fallen out of the habit of blogging.

The other day something reminded me of an old blog entry I'd written, and I decided to go back and find it. I ended up looking over a bunch of old blog entries. I'd for gotten how often I'd written, and how much. I wrote in more than one blog, too. And, even if I do say it myself--some of my blog posts were really entertaining. I ended up laughing out loud when I read a few of them.

I made alot of good new habits on my mission, but I think I lost some good ones too.

I'd like to get back into the habit of blogging. I never really had a schedule before, I just wrote when I had a thought I wanted to throw out of a funny story to share. I'd like to try and see if I can get back into that habit again... if it doesn't work, I may set a more specific schedule for myself.

This is connected to a thought thats been rolling around in the back of my head (which I just posted as my facebook status). It is this: activities where I've learned to get over my mistakes and have fun are those that I've improved most in and bring me the most joy--art and dancing. Those that I still have a hard time getting over my mistakes in I haven't improved in and tend to avoid--specifically, speaking and writing.

What started me thinking about this was a little thing, really. In one of my classes I made a comment that didn't make much sense. It was actually a really dumb comment. I got some raised eyebrows and chuckles and the class discussion moved on. Nobody else in the class probably remembers my dumb comment, at least not very specifically. But all day afterward and into the next, I kept remembering the mistake and wincing. Why did I say such a dumb thing?

In dancing I am very aware of the fact that I'm not great, sometimes I slip or don't follow an obvious lead or, yes, step on someones toes, and thats just how the dance goes, and I laugh and keep dancing. After years of participating in art critiques, I'm pretty good at not getting offended at comments, instead just taking them as they're meant, analyzing them, and then applying those that I feel will actually be helpful--all without getting all hurt and offended.

Actually, I think this was one of the biggest reasons that I chose to major in Art rather than English (which, when it really comes down to it, are the only two majors I really considered--I can't see myself actually majoring an anything else.) I enjoy both. But I knew that I would have a much harder time accepting critiques of my writing than of my art, and would therefore have an easier time in art. Did I choose the easy way out? Maybe in this specific aspect of the choice. Overall, I don't think so. I chose the one where I knew I would be better able to learn from my mistakes.

Is that strange? It seems like someone should either be good at getting over any mistake, or not. You're either prideful, or not. I guess people aren't that simple.

Anyway. So I want to get back to writing a blog again, just as a way to do a little low-pressure writing.